Category: Journal Entry



This is an update about me and the reason I have not been posting. Yes, I was very depressed but there was something else going on. I was having blinding headaches and they were worse than my normal migraines. I have injections of Botox to stop them but instead they were getting worse.



This is a little note to my readers to let you know I have not been posting much and I am not sure how long this will last. I am feeling depressed and just need to step back for a few days so I can work on getting better. It is not easy thinking of fun sexy things when your happy mind is sleeping. … Read More Depression



I don’t think I have ever read a post about this subject, thoughtfulness. What does it mean to you within the lifestyle? What does it mean for you partner?
Thoughtfulness is simply – thoughtful and considered attention, careful deliberation before action.


My New Best Friend

I am so excited because darling S. finished my surprise. I just wanted to share it with you.



I said in a previous post about putting more funny things in the blog to make it more fun so I thought I would write a piece on comparing stereotypical lifestyle dynamics versus real life. Please remember this is funny but has a pretty serious tone to it.


RED 10

Yes this is another post about a safe word but this was spoken completely outside of any scene. It is the first time in my life I had used one.


Taking a break from meme’s

Over the last few weeks there have been some very serious questions from different meme’s I enjoy. I have touched on some very serious subjects that are emotional and some just plain horrifying. Please don’t get me wrong I felt some of them needed to be answered and I did my best to stay true to myself. My Darling S. feels the same way.


Do you ever…?

Do you ever look at this world and have your eyes over stimulated by the glory of it’s colour? Well I feel like that at times. I wish I had a dimmer switch where I could tone down everything to black and white and shades of grey so it didn’t overwhelm my senses.


It has always been my aim to act like a lady. No matter my role in BDSM I maintain that outside of the bedroom. During a scene I can be a slut, a whore and even a cock sucker in the literal sense, but you better not call me those names outside of the bedroom.


Anais Nin

I am a huge fan of Anais Nin a diarist and writer. She also wrote erotica. It is rumoured that she was into the lifestyle. I just lose myself in her wonderful quotes and I would love to share some with you. She had also written a few books you might want to read.


Me and Darling S.

This post was suggested by Nero Black after reading my TMI post about the long and winding road that is my relationship with my Darling S. so here goes. ~ taking a deep breath ~



Well as you all must be aware I have gone crazy writing Meme’s but by doing that I have not done a journal entry to say Hi! to everyone. I also miss doing it.


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