Violence is such an ugly word and like the act of saying the word tastes ugly on your tongue. Violence against men, women and even children is wrong no matter how you look at it and without exception it is wrong.

I normally speak to S. before I write on the blog and he pointed out this point to me. Accepting violence in your life can be a result of having no self confidence. You become bowed down and lose your fight. No one has the right to do that. For those of you in these circumstances please, find your courage, pack your bags and get the hell out of there.


If there is no confidence in your partner, build them up until they have it. Then begin to enjoy the journey. We spent ages working on mine. Yes we still played but S. would not go into the darker of my fantasies until he knew 100% I would stop him if he went too far.

I know many people looking into the lifestyle might see what we do as violence but it certainly isn’t. Every slap, cut of the whip, nipple clamp is discussed and agreed to before two become a couple. There is no escalation unless spoken of. No loss of control. You can put the limits in written form if you need to.

Slap my face during a scene and it will excite me beyond measure. A hand around my throat, even choking me and it has the same affect. But if a man did that to me out of play even if it was BDSM, I would deck them very quickly and have them up on charges of assault. Sorry my Aussie is peeping through. For deck put punch them so hard they soon find their asses on the floor. Yes I am a smidge under five foot but I never said I would punch them in the face – evil grin – .

Please read my words carefully and I know you will understand the difference between violence and lifestyle. Spread the word if you can. If you know someone living with violence please reach out to them and tell them where they can get help. If they choose to do nothing then there is little chance of getting them help. That is very sad but true.

Be safe and still have loads of fun.

S. and K.

4 Comments on “Violence

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