There is something brewing inside of me. All this freedom I have is not helping me. It is like a boil trying to work it’s way out of me. It’s all hot and painful. I can feel it burrowing out of me.
That dreaded ‘B’ word is being bandied around and it is making me uneasy. What ‘B’ word you ask, B R A T. That’s the one that is shaking me up. A good submissive is not a brat, it goes against everything I was taught many, many years ago.
Things have changed beyond all recognition now. I don’t use labels but this one seems to be giving me trouble and dogs my footsteps. I am not a little, I know that for sure so can a grown assed woman be a brat? So it would seem. I have a wicked sense what I should not be doing and that little devil in me spurs me on. I was worried that my rebellion would undermine us. S. and I spoke about it and when I mentioned the word brat he smiled. He always smiles. He then said, ‘Took you long enough.’ I have to wonder how many times he is going to have to say that to me.
He then said, ‘Do I look as if I can’t handle it darling?’
Suddenly I knew, ‘No, you can handle it.’
All I have to do now is to let go of the preconceived concepts. It will not be the only part of me so I am quickly moving out from under the label. It will not undermine our relationship because I won’t throw tantrums too often. I think it will enhance if anything. S. does love a good tousle.
So I am left with this and it is in my hands to play with. Well I might get burned but I might also have a good time and I think it will be the latter. It just might be an interesting time for S. and I.
Sir and kitten